This morning, I watched a neighborhood line up to pay their respects to Jahalal Lee.
This afternoon, I watched a community mourn as they rolled the casket out of the church.
This evening, I watched a family breakdown as they had to bury their 18-year-old son.
Jahalal Malik Lee. Born December 16, 1990, was shot and killed September 21, 2009 on the corner of Herkimer st. and Rochester ave. in Bed-Stuy Brooklyn, New York. For the first three years, he attended Far Rockaway High School, and because of some issues regarding gangs and continuing his education, he transferred to Boys and Girls High School 3 weeks ago. Sources said he was on his way home one evening and was approached by four males. Words were shared and he pushed his way past, deciding to not deal with them. The males chased him and less than 20 feet from his front door; he was shot in the back of his head. He was 18 and he definitely didn't deserve that... no one deserves that, but HE ... no, NO ONE deserves that.
Too many times, especially in 2009, we hear about these people dying, but there are too many times where it is someone young and full of life. Teens living in cities are dying well before their time. Parents are forced to bury their children, and that's a serious problem. But you know what else a serious problem is? Our society. There are too many people who will sit here and read this and think "Well, what did HE do? What did HE say to the boys, or was HE in a gang?" True, these questions are valid, but the bigger questions are, "What did WE do? What did WE say when we saw the confrontation going down that night? Where were WE when he felt like he had no one to turn to?" I don't expect anyone to go out and be a superhero and fight my battles, or the next guys’ battles, but I grew up hearing "It takes a village to raise a child," and that's the truth. I was lucky enough to grow up with both my parents in the house, but I have learned PLENTY lessons from those around me. We tend to cast youth off and blame them solely for what they do. Tyra came on today with these girls who were between the ages of 13 and 15 and were having unprotected sex/multiple partners/allowing themselves to be recorded during sex/experimenting with drugs/etc. When they were asked why they thought this was okay, they responded "It makes me feel good, like he loves me." Yes, the acting out IS from them, they are to blame, but where were the mothers when they were sneaking around? What is happening in their home where they can ONLY feel loved and sexy when with a man?
So now you might think, "I ain't raisin nobody else's kid! I got my own problems to worry about!" But what happens to being a role model? Because, no matter WHOM YOU ARE, there is always someone looking up to you. If it isn't a younger family member, then it's a younger neighbor. If not that, then it’s a friend who might not be as put together as you are. With this I ask, live your life as if it's something to be proud of. BE PROUD of yourself, but also, try and live your life as if when you looked back on it, you won't be ashamed. Setting a good example starts from within. Start from yourself and work outwards. LEAD FROM EXAMPLE. Preach the word AND live the truth. I honestly feel that with the proper mentoring, we can change the world.
I read this and felt like i should say something. Well you know who i am. As an uncle of 12 nieces and nephews and 1 more on the way, this is one of my worst feers. That one of them will get thier life snubbed away by something so pointless. This is not how life is supposed to go. (my opinion) We are supposed to send off our parents, not them sending us off.
ReplyDeleteIm 33 years old and when I was comming up, even the neighbors would whoop our azz when we stepped off the right path and got another one when our parents got home. I dont exactly support beating a child. But the way the world is going, I cant say im against it. lol.
Its sad when kids cant go to school to learn things to better themself. Instead they go to school to worry about how they match up against other students, fashion wise or to cut class to go get high or have sex. Im not I was gonna say im such an angel, but damn. You know things are bad when kids go to school to be in fear.
No one really teaches kids anymore that the ones they hurt or kill, is someones son,daughter,father,mother etc. No one paints the picture that its gonna hurt that family the same way it will hurt thiers, if something was to happen to them. To be honest, kids need the fear of god in them. When that is achieved, children will become children again.
This was deep. It is sad that these kids are being buried by their parents when it should be the other way around. No parent should have to bury their child. The pain they feel can only be imagined.
ReplyDeleteHopefully this society can start changing...
You kno what they say "how can you expect anyone to love you when you don't love yourself." People just gotta develop that inner confidence and love for themselves...and also that having sex, doing drugs, or being part of gangs isnt the way to get there. It's the responsibility of a person's family and friends to support their children, sibilings and peers, but even with amazing support, if you don't feel self love from within you, you'll always be seeking love and affection in all the wrong places to validate the person you are.
ReplyDeleteI find personally when someone has confidence, they send out this positive energy into the world that attracts people to them..and when someone has no self-confidence the opposite happens. No one likes a downer, and everyone seems to want to be around someone who love him/herself and loves life.
Just what I can say..
I absolutely remember this story J and I can't tell you how heartbroken I was when this story broke on the news. You are right we far too often say to ourselves that we need to mind own business or I'm not raising anyone else children. It is said in the bible that "it takes a village" maybe not in those exact words but anyone who has a praying grandmother knows where to find it in the bible. It used to be true back in the day that we can count on each other in the community to show positive role models for our young black youth. We need more accountability and responsibility for own actions. Thats the difference between white communities and inner city black communities. They are proactive, we are reactive and it's about time we get proactive. We can't blame everything on the police and We can't leave everything up to Al Sharpton to handle.
ReplyDeleteThe sad part is that as families fell apart in these "modern times" so did the "villages" which led to the demise of communities in which love and mutual respect was cultivated...
ReplyDeletemy heart bleeds for this family as i know how it is to loose someone so young and with so much potential in life over foolishness and blissful ignorance but the war is not ours.
we can only hope for peace to be betsowed upon the souls of every member in this family cause rest assured the one above will have the last word...i pray for them even more than the family cause with love the family will overcome...
maybe that can be a catalyst for that particular community.
Ty
With no guidance, kids grow up not realizing either their worth or their stake in the daily challenge that is living in this society.
ReplyDeleteThe constant quest for validation makes them take paths their immature minds understand almost nothing about because to them the less travelled roads are associated with the concept of rebellion.
When Egos are boosted by the wrong factors, weaknesses are not consolidated, souls get degraded... and slowly monsters are created...
Everyday they stab others with their words, punch them in the face with their actions, and end up killing them... litteraly.
The wisemen are nowhere to be found so "villages" are burning... fast.